Tag Archives: life

Let’s Raise Awareness For Autism

About a year ago, a good friend of mine’s son was diagnosed with Autism. Before his diagnosis, she had a feeling that something wasn’t right and thankfully because she listened to her instinct, her son was diagnosed and is getting the treatment that he needs. Before meeting my friend, I had never met a child with Autism. Honestly I wouldn’t have known he was autistic, if she didn’t tell me. He behaves better than my 5 year old :). I’m writing this post, not to tell my friend’s story, but to help bring awareness to this very misunderstood and underfunded disease.

In the Summer I read this amazing book called “The Spark“, by Kristine Barnett, which helped open my eyes to what Autism is all about. It showed me how these children are absolutely brilliant but they can’t communicate or express themselves, which then leads them to become frustrated. I wrote a post about it, click here to read about how much this book touched me and how being diagnosed with Autism is not a death sentence. We need to start looking at Autistic children as true gifts to us and to society. In Kristine’s book, she explains that her 15-year-old son is on track to win a Nobel Prize for his work in theoretical physics. She also recounts how her son had predicted Hurricane Katrina, just by examining weather charts and patterns. Imagine what a mind like this could do to help this world, to help society? Imagine that there are hundreds of thousands of children like my friend’s son and Kristine’s son, just waiting for their potential to be discovered!!!

A study just released some very alarming stats that 1 in 68 children in the US have Autism and Health Canada states that 1 in 150-160 are Autistic. Is this because we have better ways of testing children? Do we test them earlier? Do we have more environmental causes? No one really knows, but without further study and funding we will never know. We will also never know the full potential of these beautiful souls. The symbol for Autism is a puzzle piece, because the illness is a puzzle that has many sides and facets and that in order for scientists and researchers to put the pieces together, they need to better understand Autism and in order to do that, they need more funding!!!

The month of April is Autism awareness month and the company, Stella & Dot, is selling 4 fabulous items and the net proceeds go to helping support Autism Awareness. This is a 2-fold, win-win, situation. You get to add some great colour to your wardrobe and you get to support a great cause in the process.

I dedicate this post to my friend, her son and to all mother’s, children and families who are affected by Autism. I hope that someday soon we will no longer have a stigma attached to Autism and that every child will be able to get the help they need.

May this blog inspire you to help support research for Autism and to help breakdown the walls of stigma surrounding this illness.

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Happy Friday and Weekend Everyone!!!!

A Very Big Thank You & St. Patrick’s Day Outfit

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Yesterday was St. Patrick’s Day and I decided to celebrate by wearing a green cardigan. Gotta say I’m loving that Spring is just around the corner. I’m looking forward to wearing more bright colours!!!!! To keep myself warm, I layered a green cardigan over a simple white 3/4 length t-shirt and paired it with trouser jeans, loafers and added a brown blazer.

Jacket (RW & Co.). Necklace, T-Shirt & Loafers (J Crew). Cardigan (H&M). Purse (Banana Republic). Bracelets (Stella & Dot). Watch (Michael Kors).

I just wanted to say a very big THANK YOU to the 15 ladies who not only shared a picture of themselves without any make up on, but took the time to compose a thoughtful and heart felt post. It means a lot to me that you took the time to not only bravely pose for a picture sans make up, but that you took the time to compose a post that came from the heart. This post resonated with many people. I now am seeing people posting pictures of themselves without make up on, on Facebook. Hooray, let’s start celebrating our uniqueness!!! So as a big thanks, I wanted to give a special shout out to the following 15 ladies who linked up. I want to add that I wasn’t able to post a couple of the ladies pictures as it would not save properly, but I’ll include a link to their site anyways.

Megan from Pink Pretty/ Liska from New Mum Online/ Rachel from The Random Writings/ Che from Dressing Up For Me

Whitney from Whitney A La Mode/ Lisa from The Somewhat Domestic Goddess/ Monika from Little Miss Scientist/ Zaz from Mama and More

Inge from This Ever Evolving Life/ Sarah Christine from Sarah Christine Style/ Danielle from A Little Bit of WoWe/ Bri from Work Clothes, I Suppose/ Ada from Elegance & Mommyhood

Tori from Fashion, Bling and Other Girly Things

Angie from Reasons To Dress

Lulu from Simply Lulu Style

May this blog inspire you to accept your beauty, inside and out. If you’re interested in reading the post I’m talking about, click here and here.

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Don’t forget to link up Thursday for my weekly Tres-Chic Fashion Thursday Link Up.

Happy Tuesday Everyone!!!!

Oxford Shirt: 5 Ways

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I just have to gush a bit about my son :)! On Tuesday I registered him for Kindergarten. KINDERGARTEN!!!!!! When did this happen? How did he go from a baby to now a school aged child?!?!?!?!?!? It seems like just yesterday he was lying on the mattress of my hospital bed, where I told him to not get too big too quickly.

Now look at him :):

Let’s just say that after I left the school, I had tears in my eyes. Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy that he is going to Kindergarten in the Fall, but it also saddens me. It’s just that he is getting too big, too fast. I know I’m not the only one who feels the same way. I’m just so proud of him.

One staple that should be in every woman’s closet is a white Oxford shirt!! It’s something that you can wear with anything. It’s one of the most versatile pieces you will have in your closet, I promise. You can wear it simple casual with a pair of boyfriend jeans, add a cardigan, add a blazer, layer it under a sweater or under a dress. The possibilities are endless. Check out the 5 ways I styled my white Oxford shirt.

Style it simple with boyfriend jeans and flats

Shirt & Boyfriend Jeans (Gap). Purse (J Crew). Shoes (Toms c/o Aritzia). Bracelet (Gigglosophy). Watch (Michael Kors).

Style it preppy layered under a sweater with cropped pants

Sweater (J Crew). Shirt (Jacob). Pants (Gap). Flats (Aldo). Necklace (J Crew). Purse (Banana Republic). Bracelets (Stella & Dot). Watch (Michael Kors).

Style it under a dress with boots and a statement necklace

Dress (Aritzia). Top (Gap). Necklace (Stella & Dot). Tights & Belt (Jacob). Boots (Aldo).

Style it with a jacket and cropped pants

Top & Pants (Gap). Jacket (Jacob). Purse (Banana Republic). Shoes (Rocket Dog).

Style it under a cardigan with skinny jeans and boots

Top (Jacob). Cardigan (J Crew). Jeans (J Brand c/o Aritzia). Boots (Browns). Necklace (Stella & Dot). Bracelet (Gigglosophy).

Below are 3 great options for an Oxford shirt:

1/ 2/ 3

May this blog inspire you to purchase an Oxford shirt and see the different ways you can style it. Remember, fit is everything. Try it on. It should be comfortable and should not gape between the boobs, if it does, try going up a size or you can put a snap on the inside of it, to keep it from gapping.

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Don’t forget to link up tomorrow for my weekly Tres-Chic Fashion Thursday Link Up.

Happy Hump Day Everyone!!!!!!!

How I’m Achieving My 2014 Goals

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It’s great and very ambitious that with each new year, everyone is all hyped about their “New Years Resolutions”. They plan these amazing goals to reach: get healthier, exercise more regularly, drink less coffee, drink less alcohol, get more sleep, etc… and then about the beginning of February, it all goes to shit. It’s like our motivation is gone. We start working out less, sleeping less, therefore drinking more coffee, every day stress is starting to build again. Soon we’ve completely stopped even making an effort to keep our resolutions.

Here’s the problem: we set ourselves up to fail. We set these unrealistic, overly ambitious goals where there is no way we can achieve them. What we need to do is start setting more realistic, honest goals and work on them one at a time. There’s no possible way that we can work on all of our goals at once. This is how we set ourselves up for failure. Instead of saying ok I’m going to slowly cut down my coffee intake -more realistic, we say we are going cold turkey- unrealistic, and then we find ourselves totally back to drinking as much coffee or more then we did before.

For me 2014 is totally about setting realistic goals and that by the end of this year achieving them. If you didn’t get a chance to read that post, click here to read my goals for 2014. It’s really nice to read about everyone’s goals but do they actually achieve them and how do they go about achieving them. So today’s post is about how I’m achieving my goals.

1. Balance: Achieving balance is something that most of us strive for and can be hard to attain. For me I want 2014 to be filled with less stress not more. A few weeks back I realized that there was no way I could have a post done and I didn’t have it completed, nor did I stress about it. Blogging should be fun, not stressful.

Balance also includes doing more for myself like going back to yoga. I’ve been once a week for the past 2 weeks and it feels great. Rather than saying that I’ll do yoga everyday, which is completely unrealistic, I told myself to start once a week. It’s much more realistic and something that yes I can actually do. I also look at going to yoga as 1.5 hrs for me, me time. It’s a necessity to help keep me balanced and to help heal my back.

2. Fun: Fun can be hard to do when you have kids. It’s hard to make time for fun (adult fun) when you are busy running after a 4.5 yrs old going on 15!!!!!! A girlfriend and I have decided that once a month we are having a girl’s night, just the 2 of us. Each month we do something different. In November we went downtown shopping. December was a right off. This month, as long as she feels better, we are headed to the Fairmont for High Tea. This gives us both something to look forward to and helps break up the hard, challenging days. I’m also going to host a season finale party for Downton Abbey, complete with little sandwiches and fabulous tea. For me fun is about doing things that I want to do with the people that I care about. Life is way too short not to enjoy it.

3. Spend more time with my husband!!! As my husband wraps up his current contract, things are busier then ever, but we are working hard at making time for us. We watch our favourite PVR’d shows when my son is in bed. My husband also downloaded a great, but short lived series, called Firefly, that was amazing. It was nice to relax and watch a fun show together. We are planning a mini staycation in April, can’t wait for that. It’s not always about going out, for me spending time with my husband could just mean eating chips in bed and watching a good dumb movie. As long as I’m with him, that’s all that really matters.

4.Spend less, save more!!!!! Our upcoming trip to Disneyland has been the kick in the butt I needed to start saving more. There are also other expenses that come up with travelling, like renewing your passports. I’ve found some ways to save for that as well, like cleaning out my closet and selling some clothes, also selling some old books and toys. I did a bit of that before Christmas and I was able buy some Christmas presents with that money. Also I am really looking at what is a need and what is a want. Most of what I see is a want, not a need and right now Disneyland takes priority over any wants. I’m also going to be using my tax refund to buy a new DSLR camera!!!! I truly believe that if there is a will, there is a way and I definitely have the will. Take a few minutes out of your day and see where you could save or ways to earn a bit extra cash.

A friend of mine, Kathryn, who also happens to be a money coach, recently posted this on Facebook. It’s an easy way to save money in 1 year, 52 weeks to be exact. The idea is that you put away the number in dollars of the week of the year you happen to be in. For example if it’s the first week in 2014, you put $1 away, 2nd week $2, the 52nd week $52. So the most you ever put away in one week is $52. The total you end up saving in 1 year is $1378. That’s quite a bit of money for not doing much. Below is the cheat sheet that my friend posted. I’ve started this and I can’t wait until I have that money in the bank saved up nicely :).

Savings: Vodka Infused Lemonade

5.Bucket list: I haven’t yet started working on this. Like I said, I’m trying to focus on a few of the goals at a time, trying to make it more realistic that I will be able to achieve them.

6.Get healthier: My back injury has definitely left me no choice but to get my back into better shape. Like I wrote above, yoga is not an option, it has to be done!!!!! I look at my upcoming week and then I see the day that I can go to yoga. It usually is on a day where my son has preschool so that while he is there, I can go to yoga. Kill two birds with one stone. I also went to donate blood last week and was denied because I have low hemoglobin. I have a doctor’s appointment next week, but until then I have been trying to enrich my diet with iron rich things like taking a multivitamin, making chocolate chip cookies with dark chocolate chips, oatmeal and whole wheat (all have a good amount of iron in them), eating more dark leafy greens like putting Kale into my smoothie or a spinach salad with dinner, eating more nuts and pumpkin seeds are super rich in iron. So this is how I’m trying to get healthier.

7. Focus on the positive. That’s a constant work in progress. Definitely going to yoga has helped me to be more positive. Like after yoga, I stopped off to do some grocery shopping and the guy behind me was inpatient, saying “no one likes to wait.” Instead of jumping on the bandwagon, I just reminded myself to stay zen and to not bother with that guy. It’s not like it would help speed up the line or anything.

8. Being the best person, mom, wife, friend that I can be. This also a work in progress. It’s a constant struggle to not let other people’s negativity and issues get to you. One thing that I am going to do is rather then growl at someone for being bitchy towards me, I am going to kill them kindness. Yes you heard me. We all have shit in our lives and everyone perceives things differently so the next time I’m faced with a grumpy person rather then growl at them, I will smile and be kind and hopefully that kindness will rub off on them and they will pay that forward. Below are 2 great quotes that I try and keep in mind every day.

So there you go everyone, how I’m going about achieving my goals. It’s a work in progress, but life is a work in progress. Yes I’m going to have days where I won’t go to yoga or days where I have no patience left and do growl at someone, but I am human afterall.

May this blog inspire you to not only write down your goals but how you are going to achieve them. Studies have shown that those who not only write down their goals but how they are going to achieve them are more likely to succeed in achieving them.

Happy Friday & Weekend Everyone!!!!!

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Why I Paint My Son’s Nails & Why He Got Princesses For Christmas!!!

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Last week I posted this picture on Facebook of my son, my husband and myself celebrating New Years. I received a comment, not saying how happy my son looks or how much fun we are having, instead asking why my son is wearing nail polish? That sent me into defensive mama bear mode!!!!! WTF!!!! Why is it such a problem that my son is wearing nail polish??? Are we still living in the 1900′s?? No we are not!!! Why do we have to raise our children to only play with cars if they’re boys or to play with dolls if they’re girls??? Why should we associate blue with boys and pink with girls??? Why not teach our children to develop both sides of their brain equally and let them explore playing with dolls if they want to, or to play with cars if they choose to.

A good friend of mine left me this comment after I posted that my son had asked for 3 Princesses for Christmas: “I love how you are raising your son without the usual gender barriers put up in this world! Who doesn’t love a princess?!”

Exactly, who doesn’t love a Princess??? I think the appeal to my son is that they are pretty and that they are different from whatever he has. Their dresses are sparkly and colourful. The DVD’s are fun and musical. Why not like Princesses???

Children go through various phases where they play with one item for a few months and then move on. This may or may not be a phase and even if it isn’t, I don’t care. Yes I’m upset by that comment because it’s ignorant!!!!!!

On Facebook about 6 months ago, a mom had posted a comment about painting her son’s nails and asked other moms what their experiences were. It was so nice to see other moms having positive reactions and responses. I know that at first when my son asked me to paint his nails, I was worried that he would be teased. If you know my son, if there is any little boy that can pull off nail polish it’s him!!!!!!!! So far, except for this one ignorant comment, we have been fortunate. Most kids and parents think it’s cool, and honestly no one really cares.

This bares the question why do we raise our children with gender barriers???

I’ll be perfectly honest, when we had our son, I never thought in a million years that he would be registered in dance class or wanted his nails painted and to play with princesses!!!!! What my husband and I have tried to foster in him is his interests, not our own. We’ve tried to support whatever he is interested in. Take dancing for example, he fell in love with the PBS show Angelina Ballerina. This didn’t come from me, it came from him. He would dance around the house and then one day I asked him “Would you like to take dance classes?” He answered with an enthusiastic “YES!!! “. This is his second year in dance and he absolutely loves it. He is thriving in this environment and again it had nothing to do with my husband or I. We just went with what my son wanted.

The person who I’m proud of the most is my husband. He absolutely doesn’t care one way or the other about my son’s fascination with princesses. He applauds it and has said many times “well, they are pretty :)!”. Too many men let their own fears and insecurities prevent them for seeing their child for who they are, which is just that, a child. It’s their job to explore different themes and toys. My son sees me paint my nails and wants his painted as well, monkey see, monkey do.

So the next time you see a little boy with his nails painted, or playing with dolls, or wearing pink shoes, smile and give the mom a wink. Congratulate her for being brave enough not to care about society norms and pressures. Our jobs as parents is to foster our children’s interests and love them for who they are, not to set our preconceived notions about what type of toys boys and girls should play with. So let’s do away with gender barriers and just let kids be kids!!!!!!

May this blog inspire you to evaluate your own gender barriers. Do you have any? Do you care?

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Happy Friday and Weekend Everyone!!!!!!

Welcome 2014!!!!

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Happy 2014 Everyone!!!!!!!!! For all of us, the beginning of a new year is the chance to start fresh, to change things that we may have wanted to in the past but didn’t get around to. For me 2014 is the chance to look at what I want to happen this year. So here is what I want for myself for 2014:

1. One of my favourite bloggers, Rita from Coast With Me, left me a message wishing me more “me” time in the New Year. Last year I struggled a lot with finding time for myself and it didn’t get any easier as the holidays approached, hence my 2 week blogging hiatus. So this year I want to focus on trying to get more balance in my life. I know we all say it, but for me it’s a must. 2013 ended with me trying to recover from a work related back injury while I was trying to juggle a new work schedule, blogging, Christmas preparation and it got to be way too much. I got so overwhelmed that I became a not so nice person. Ok I’ll say it, I became extremely bitchy. This is not what I want for myself or for my family. Blogging is supposed to be a creative outlet, not stress inducing. So I ask that you be patient with me and if you see that I haven’t posted in a few days, please keep reading and know that I will be back shortly.

2. I want to have more fun this year Life is much too short and I want to enjoy it more. I’ve got all these fun ideas about activities and events that I want to do and well I’m going to do it. No time like the present!!!!!!

3. Spend more time with my husband!!!!!!!! These past few years my husband’s work schedule has been insane, to say the least, and I’m hoping with his new job, that he will have a better work life balance

4. Spend less, save more!!!!! We’ve got a big trip planned to Disneyland in the Fall and we’ve decided to not put any of it on credit. This being said, this shopaholic has to start prioritizing what’s a need and what is a want!!! This is definitely a good motivator to keep my shopping in check, because I’m not sure who is more excited about this trip, me or my son????

5. Work on my bucket list. Last year I purchased a cork board with the intention of putting all my goals, dreams, basically my bucket list, on it. Good intentions yes, but I never got around to it. So this year my goal is to get it started. Bucket lists constantly change and grow and my goal is to get it started.

6. Get healthier. Since I had Pericarditis 1.5 years ago and then injured my back in November, working out has taken a back seat. I now have permission from my physio to get back to yoga (it’s been almost 2 years :() and that is exactly what my tired, tight muscled body needs!!!!! I need to strengthen my core and my back and get myself back to a place where I’m not afraid of re-injuring my back. I also just want to be healthier for my family. I want to set a good example for my son. I went back on Thursday to Yoga and it felt great. My body was sore, but it was an amazing, good kind of sore.

7. Focus on the positive, instead of the negative. When I get stressed I tend to focus on all the negative things in my life, at work and out there in the world. I don’t mean to be negative, I think it just becomes my coping mechanism. I feel like at times, I absorb all the negative energy around me and it overwhelms me to the point where that’s all I see, feel and speak. Part of the solution is to surround myself with positive people, but sometimes that can be hard. I want to work on taking “personal time outs” when I feel like I’m getting overwhelmed and stressed and try to keep myself from delving into the negative.

8. Being the best person, mom, wife, friend that I can be. We are all a constant work in progress and by no means am I implying that I want to be the “perfect” person, mom, wife or friend. That doesn’t exist!!!!!!!! I just want to try and be the best version of me that I can be.

So there you have it, my 8 personal goals for 2014. Do you have any goals for this upcoming new year?? If so how are you going to go about it to ensure that you follow through?

May this blog inspire you to come up with your own personal goals for 2014. They don’t have to be big or lavish. They can be as simple as learning to cook or read more books, etc…

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Happy Friday and first weekend of the New Year!!!!!!!

Moms Vs. Moms: Why Can’t We Just All Play Nicely Together!!!!

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Why can’t we women just be nice to one another?? Why is it that we must be catty, hurtful, spiteful and vengeful towards one another?? Why can’t we all just get along???? This picture is a perfect example of women. We are constantly at each other’s throats, judging the other person and gossiping about another woman. Why can’t we just play nicely with each other??

We teach our children, from a young age, to be nice to one another, so why can’t we moms practice what we preach??? We aren’t nice to one another. We’re all guilty of judging another women the minute they walk into the room. We give them the once over look (and you know what look I’m talking about) and make them feel like shit. We’re all guilty of that, including myself!!!! Am I proud of that? NO!!!!!! I’m not and for a while now I’ve made a conscious effort to not do it.

I had this happen to me a few years ago at a child’s birthday party. One of the moms attending the party gave me the worst up and down stare I’ve ever had. I felt awful afterwards. Not sure what her problem was, was it the cardigan and belt that I wore that offended her? I’m not sure.

Here’s the truth, it had nothing to do with me. It had everything to do with her. She was self-conscious and took it out on me. This is our problem Moms and Women!!!!!!!! We make it out to be about the other person when in fact it has nothing to do with them. It’s all about us and how insecure we feel about ourselves!!!!

Why do we have to make another mom feel crappy about herself because she took the time to dress up or that she packed a certain lunch for her kid or that she took the time and effort to make cute cupcakes for her kid’s classmates!!!!! Why???? Do we really feel better about ourselves after we treat another woman like shit??? I don’t think so!!!!!!!!

Take men for example. There’s no bickering like this. If another guy is wearing something they like they say “hey man, like your vest, where’d you get it?” If even that. They don’t sit there eyeing the other guy, giving him the evil eye, because he had the audacity to dress up. No, they just sit around and drink beers and shoot the shit about sports. They don’t harbour any resentment towards the other guy for dressing a certain way or for doing something better than them.

We women need to stop this awful, childish behaviour. Like I said before, WE ARE ALL GUILTY OF THIS BEHAVIOR!!!!! At one point in our lives we’ve all done this and I’m ashamed.

This could not have come out at a better time. This woman posted this picture on her Facebook page to remind us all that we are busy and full of excuses why not to exercise and the backlash against this poor woman has been insane. People are saying that she is a bad mother, neglecting her kids, “fat bashing”. Honestly the only people saying this are those that are unhappy with themselves and their bodies. They are insecure about the way they look and feel the need to lash out at this mom. This woman was not “fat bashing”, she was merely trying to make a point that we all have our excuses for not exercising but we need to start making it a priority.

I don’t know this woman and I don’t want to speak for her, but here’s the message I got out of this: she is teaching her kids that she values herself enough to take good care of herself; that she wants to be around to live a healthy life for herself and for her kids; she is teaching her kids about health and nutrition. So please all you insecure people that are ripping this poor woman a new hole, get off your fucking pedestals and stop attacking her!!!! Start looking at your own life and stop judging someone else. You’re not going to change the way you feel about yourself by attacking someone else. All this woman was trying to do was shed some light on the fact that we are all busy and have a myriad of excuses for not exercising. We all need to make a conscious effort to get healthy.

The DJ’s on the radio the other day were debating this and one of them said it was “fat bashing” and the other one said that we are all guilty of this. She raised a great question “none of us spend any time in front of the tv!!!!!!”. We all do and that was the point, this woman is not neglecting her kids as she works out 1 hr a day and her husband looks after them. She is making a choice to take care of herself instead of sitting in front of the tv, which we are all guilty of.

My good friend is a fitness trainer and she looks amazing. Do I judge her for looking the way she does? No. I’m proud of her and I also know that I will never look like her, but that’s ok. Her goal is to get people to be healthier and that is also the goal of Maria’s.

We all make the choice to eat that donut and to not exercise. No one forces us to eat unhealthy, it’s our choice and we should stop slamming other women for their choice to be healthy. I love my friend Jenny and am proud of how healthy and amazing she looks. She is my inspiration. We should look at Maria for inspiration, not to look like her, but to be the healthiest we can be.

So please let’s all stop this insane business of bashing one another, beating the other person down all because of our own insecurities. Good for this woman for taking care of herself. Good for that mom who dresses nicely. Good for that mom who takes the time to make cupcakes for her kids class. Good for that mom who makes her baby’s baby food from scratch. This is not a competition ladies, so let’s stop perpetuating this. We should be empowering one another, not breaking each other down!!!!!

I vow to stop this right now. All it takes is for us, women, to take a stand and say no more!!!!! I will not tolerate this anymore and nor should the rest of us. Let’s stop bullying one another and making each other feel like shit because of how we feel about ourselves. Let’s start building one another up to be the best moms, women, wives, people we can be!!!!

I know that I focus this blog on fashion, but when you look at the core of it, it’s not about designer brands or dressing like a movie star, it’s about being the best person you can be, it’s about feeling good about yourself, about dressing so that you feel pretty.

Yes I’m mad, because I thought all this childish behaviour was long done and buried, but I realized not that long ago, wrote a post about it here, that we women behave like a bunch of 30-40 year old teenagers!!!!!

May this blog inspire us all to stop judging one another and start behaving the way we want our children to behave!!!!

Good for Maria for having the courage to post this picture and for taking the time to stay healthy for herself and for her children. Let’s all stand together and support Maria and not tear her down!!!!!!

Happy Friday and Weekend!!!!!!

Me Day :)

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So this past weekend was my “me day”. I wrote in a previous post, here, about feeling like I’ve lost myself. I had big plans in the month of September to help get myself back to normal and well that all went to hell. I hurt my back at work, so working out and yoga was out of the question and then I caught a cold.

I think that a more realistic goal is to get myself into a good routine and into a good place by Christmas. Christmas is a great motivator for me as I love it and I would love it if I wasn’t exhausted when I entered into that crazy season.

What I have managed to do though is to go for my “me day”. This past Saturday I left the boys at home and drove downtown where I spent the night in a hotel, just me, myself and I. I can’t tell you how excited I was driving towards downtown. When I checked it I had this huge grin on my face. This was my room and I had a bath tub in my room :).

After freshining up, I headed straight to my favourite French bakery, Thierry’s, and got a ham and cheese croissant. Then I went to the Urban Tea Merchant and got my favourite Earl Grey tea. After my belly was full, I went to Holt Renfrew to check out those studded Valentino shoes that everyone, including myself, is oggling. So I found a black and red pair and I have to say that I was very disappointed. First of all they cost over $1000 (I was only looking, believe me my husband would kill me if I spent that much on shoes) and they looked cheap. I’m not being petty, it’s the truth. I felt good leaving the store and leaving them behind.

Then I made my way to J Crew where I could have spent the better part of the day perusing the store. I did end up buying the fluted skirt. I thought it would be perfect for Thanksgiving and also for Christmas.

I then went to the Bombay Brow Bar to get my eyebrows professionally shaped. What an amazing experience. I’ve had insane eyebrows since I was little. I even had a uni-brow at one point. All I can say is that if I ever have a daughter I am going to take her to get her eyebrows professionally shaped and teach her the right way to tame them. I was never taught and like many of us, over plucked them. They lady was very impressed with how well I’ve painstakingly been growing them in. I had them threaded and if you’ve never had your brows threaded, you’re missing out. So much better than waxing. Not nearly as painful.

After my brows got tamed I headed to Victoria Secret where I spent the better part of an hour trying to find the right bra. Let’s just say that I realized that I am not symmetrical, making bra shopping much harder and I’ll leave it at that.

I was starving, made my way to order my Thai take out and then headed back to the hotel. I was able to enjoy a quiet meal without being interrupted, was able to drink my fabulous bottle of Fizzio and watch tv uninterrupted. It was fabulous. Lately our meals consist of my husband and I saying every 2 minutes “Aiden eat your dinner!!!” It was wonderful to eat in peace and quiet. After my fabulous Thai dinner, I had a luxurious bath complete with candles and bubbles.

I ended the night watching Castle and passing out around 10:30. I know I sure know how to party!!! It was hard to sleep by myself. I missed my husband. I kept waking up and I couldn’t believe my eyes when I looked at the clock and it read 4:45am. I just about died. I managed to stay in bed until just after 8, ordered room service and ate my breakfast while watching the Gilmore Girls. Before I checked out I knew I had to have one more bath and while I soaked I watched Despicable Me.

Sadly my 24 hrs for myself ended much too quickly and I was quickly thrown back into reality as soon as I got home. Don’t get me wrong I’m so appreciative that I had that time to myself, I just wish I wouldn’t be so rare.

So do I feel refreshed and ready to take on the world? Well I did up until dinner that night and we had to ask my son for the millionth time to eat his dinner. All kidding aside I do feel better and feel like I’m not as overwhelmed as I was before. I am hoping to repeat this day in the Spring.

What I want you guys to get from this post is that it takes time to get yourself back to “normal”. I’m nowhere near that but like I said by Christmas I’m hoping to be there. I know that I need to eat better, exercise and do things for myself. I’m starting to and it’s helping a lot. I also know that I am not the only one who feels exhausted, overwhelmed and ready to hibernate for a few days. I know that what I am feeling is normal, but that I am the only one who can make it better.

May this blog inspire you to realize that you are not alone in feeling overwhelmed and tired and that in order for you to take care of everyone else, you must take care of yourself. I wish we could afford it for me to do this on a regular basis but we can’t. What I need to try and do is recreate it for myself at home.

Happy Friday & Weekend Everyone!!!!!!

There’s A Little Walter White In All Of Us

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Ok so you guys may be thinking that I’ve lost my mind, but bear with me, because by the end of this post, you may see a little Walt in you too.

In case you don’t know who/what I’m referring to, it’s the tv show Breaking Bad. The main character, Walter White a Chemistry high school teacher, decides to start cooking meth to help support his family during his chemotherapy treatment. They don’t have enough health insurance and Walt wants to ensure that his family is financially taken care of during his treatment and if he dies. If you want to know more about the hit tv show Breaking Bad click here.

Like I said, you guys must think that I’ve lost my mind, but hear me out. This post came to me while I was watching the series finale to Breaking Bad. Walt is having a conversation with his wife, about his reason for starting to cook Meth. Sky tells him to stop with “the helping his family bullshit” and Walt admits “I did it for me. “I liked it. I was good at it…I was alive.” I won’t ruin the ending but I will say that it was poetic.

Like many of us, Walt was a normal father, husband, brother-in-law, teacher going through the motions of life. When he first started to cook Meth it was to help support his family, but shortly afterwards it changed. He realized that by cooking Meth he had power; that when he walked into a room people noticed him. He was no longer this meek, dorky chemistry teacher. He became this powerful, energized, important person. His sex life even improved :). He became the man he always wanted to be but never had the courage to be until the Cancer came along.

Oprah has said many times that all we want is to feel important, to feel validated, to walk into a room and for people to notice us. In this sense Walt and the rest of us are no different. All Walt wanted was to provide for his family, to feel like he was something and cooking Meth gave him that feeling. I’m not saying that we should now all go out and cook Meth, but my point is that we all want to be seen, heard and validated. Meth gave Walt that validation and also turned him into a vicious, psychopathic monster.

When he said to Sky “I did it for me. “I liked it. I was good at it…I was alive.”, I was so happy that he was finally truthful with himself and with his wife. We all want to feel important, to feel alive, to do something that we are good at and cooking Meth gave Walt that sense of validation. At the end of the day all we want is for our existence to matter and that’s all Walt ever wanted. I totally understood what he was saying. I got it.

If you’ve never seen the show then this may be a bit lost on you, but I would definitely recommend watching the series. It’s nothing like anything I’ve ever seen.

I dedicate this post to you Walter White and to everyone who was apart of Breaking Bad. I am sad to see the show end, but I loved the way the show ended.

May this blog inspire you to validate the people in your life, to make them feel important, to make them feel like they are seen and heard.

Happy Friday and Weekend Everyone!!!!!!

Thank You Sheryl Sandberg!!!!!!!!

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I recently saw an interview that Oprah did with Sheryl Sandberg. Before the interview all I knew about Sheryl was that she had written a very controversial book and that she was getting lots of flack for it. After watching the interview, I was intrigued and inspired to read her book “Lean In”.

During the interview Sheryl addresses her critics and discusses many salient points. She talks about being called a “feminist” in college and how she shied away from being defined as one. When we think of feminists, many of us think of bra burning, granola eating, breastfeeding hippies. But the reality is that a feminist is just someone who wants a better world for women. In that case I am a feminist and so is almost every other woman out there. There’s nothing wrong with being a feminist.

I want to thank Sheryl for addressing many key issues that plague modern day women:

1. Can you have it all?

2. What would you do if you weren’t afraid?

3. Working together to create equality.

4. Leaning in. Sitting at the table with the big boys!!!!

5. Can a woman be successful and likeable?

6. Careers are no longer a ladder, but a jungle gym!!!

7. Importance of mentoring.

8. Being honest with yourself and others.

9. Focus on your career; don’t leave before you leave!!!

10. Make your husband a real partner: 50/50!!!

11. You can’t have it all (not at once, anyways!!!!!)

12. Working together for equality.

This book really resonated with me because we as women struggle every day to try and juggle a work life balance. I’m so glad that she was honest in acknowledging that a work-life balance doesn’t exist; that you can’t have it all, at one time. Something does have to give and that we can’t do it all at once. She explains that at different times in our lives, different things are important. When our kids are little for some women that means cutting back their work hours and taking care of them, for others their careers are what takes front seat. She explains that we need to stop focusing on trying to have it all and to realize that we can only do what we can do and that some things will have take the back burner. That doesn’t mean, though, that in our entire life time we can’t have it all, it means that at one point in time we physically can’t do it all and that we shouldn’t be expected to.

Sheryl discusses her own struggles with doing it all. She says she tries to be home at 5 pm for dinner every night and then she works after she puts her kids to bed. She acknowledges that it’s challenging and that at times she does miss recitals, bed times and soccer games but then there are times when she isn’t working and doesn’t check her phone. She says it’s a work in progress. Sheryl is honest and admits that she is not perfect and that she too is a work in progress; that at times it’s hard for her to take her own advice. I appreciate that candor because many people write books, stating that you should do things this way and that way and they aren’t able to do it. It’s nice to have someone be honest for a change and admit that it’s not easy and it takes a lot of effort.

Another point of hers I really liked was “what would you do if you weren’t afraid?” I thought about that and I still don’t have an answer. It’s a very important question and she talked about how different our lives would be if only we lived like we weren’t afraid. It’s easier said than done when we have bills to pay and need to support a family and she does acknowledge that point. What would you do if you weren’t afraid??? I wish I had an answer for that.

The one that really hit home was the point about 50/50: women working more and men helping out more at home. Sheryl explains that studies have shown that women who work are happier, in turn their marriages are better. Husbands who help out more at home equals a happier marriage and happier kids. I know from personal experience I am a much happier person, woman, mom and wife now that I’m back to working part time. Don’t get me wrong juggling everything is hard, but I feel like I got a bit of myself back. I also see that my son is happier when my husband is home taking care of him. Sheryl explains that everyone benefits when the roles are more equal. I couldn’t agree more, but the problem is achieving this. She completely acknowledges that it’s not easy and that it requires lots of hard work and communication.

This is something that my husband and I have struggled with for years, establishing more equal roles. I know that my friends and I complain a lot about juggling everything and feeling like it’s one sided. I agree with Sheryl that it’s a discussion that must be had between you and your husband. The biggest problem is that we, men and women, see things differently and have different expectations, which is why it’s so important to communicate with one another. For my husband and I it’s a work in progress. I think it’s helped that I’ve gone back to work and my husband works from home.

I could go on and on about this book. I definitely think that it’s a book that everyone should read. Our world would be a better place if there was more equality, more acceptance and support for women. It is definitely a work in progress but the only way things will change is if we women and men take the bull by the horns and make it change.

May this blog inspire you to read Sheryl’s book “Lean In”. I would love to hear your thoughts.